Tonight, I wanted to chat with you all about keeping motivated amid missteps and self-doubt. I have a habit of being extremely passionate about something for a short period of time, before fizzling out completely, and not finishing the project I worked so diligently to begin in the first place. With Pilates and with the structure of the apprenticeship program I'm in, I've had the opportunity to pursue an ambition that I have no plans of giving up as a result of the mental and physical gains I've made.
With practicing, observation, teaching, learning anatomy and doing side projects associated with the method, Pilates has become something more than a hobby, or even a career, but a way of life that has encouraged me to seek happiness and health for myself and others, above everything else. There are aspects of my Pilates education that I struggle with, but I take each challenge and eventual overcoming of said challenge as a deep and important accomplishment that propels me to continue to be a better student and teacher. It's hard not to be bogged down by what seem like cataclysmic failure, be it a bad day, a negative comment from a peer, etc. Because of this seemingly ever present anxiety, I've initiated a regimen of consistent self-encouragement, sometimes verbal, often mental, where I reinforce myself by remembering my strengths and talents and accepting my weaknesses and focusing on improvement. It's a sort of mantra I've taken on--part of a ritual that I hope will propel me to achieve my ultimate spiritual and physical objectives.
Whereas I've often looked at my artistic career and education with a competitive nature that is fueled by compliments and hindered by critiques, I refuse to let commentary or criticism keep me from reaching my ultimate short and long term goals in the realm of Pilates. Because of this, my attitude as a writer and artist has been more positive and less self-critical as of late.
At the end of the day, the end of my life, even, I know I will not regret or reflect heavily upon exact career moves I made, but rather on overall experiences I've had and the positive people and events that inspired me to become the person I am. This is the focus I will try to go into each day with. And I encourage you to do so as well.
Tease On, (for as long as you can :))
P.S. It makes me sad when I make a blog post with no pictures or visual stimulation, so here's a picture my friend took of me after I got my hands on some wild grapes. Soon I won't be able to visit my beautiful Central Park in all its green glory. I better enjoy it while it lasts!